Saturday, December 5, 2009

The force of adaptation

Today, I felt like ice cream. I went to safeway and bought some ice cream. The Asian girl, Alice, servicing two check-out stations decided to not come and bag for me when I have completed my check-out. The cashier felt embarrassed, and said... Alice, come and help me bag..., and she ignored him.

Sometimes, I feel the same way. For some reason, something inside makes me want to be strict and mean to Chinese people. Especially the girls, when I see that spark in their eyes from seeing a cute white guy passing by, I feel some how it is up to me to let her follow that spark. In fact, this thing in me make me feel like I ought to encourage her to follow that dream, instead of completing the sentence she is in the middle of speaking to me.

The force of adaptation is at work. The Bagger at the Safeway, being Asian, decided to stay away from me because she felt that bagging for me would show me preferential treatment. Just as I felt I would be unfair to the girl if I forced her to complete her conversation with me before getting distracted by a white guy. Becuase that's what she wants to do, and because of that, she did not bag for me, as she should have under any normally acceptable circumstances.

The prevailing thought here in California is that genetic mixture is a superior form of life both in principle and in practice.

The principle is idealistic: People of all races, living without genetic or cultural borders. Intermarrying, happily, working, without racism.

The practice is one of reality: Many children of parents from mixed race are smart, rich, or very very exotically beautiful.

Maybe that is the only way out... Maybe that is the only way for me to get my grocery bagged... Maybe then, I won't have to deal with these huge tsunamis of annoyance when all she wants to do is to stare at that white guy's dick as he walks by...

Thursday, December 3, 2009

About smart bugs and debugging abilities

Smart Bugs
Well, we're back at this problem again. During the day, my browser and eclipse/terminal programs consistently crash just as I am about to complete something complex and time consuming.

Then, today, when this happened to me, I suddenly realized. Maybe the super-bug that was hypothesized several years ago is actually real. For all I can tell, there is a bug in either the operating system or browser that has evolved to a point where I am made to believe that it is smart enough to detect when I'm just about to complete a complicated task. I mean, it takes quite a bit of comprehension of java code, sql code, english language, email exchanges, and IM conversations to understand why at a crash at those exact moments would cause me the most annoyance.

Sometimes, I wonder if all these bug squishing tools, automatic bug detecting programs, firewalls, and human "safe-browsing" habits has given the bugs a special challenge. And in fact the efforts we put into squishing the bugs has incentivized and facilitated an accelerated the evolution of super smart bugs that has passed the Turing test?

Debugging Ability
I've found that I have relatively poor debugging skills compared to my co-workers. I wonder if it is because I never write buggy code. Because I'd stare at the stupidest bug in the world, and not recognize it has a bug. But of course, if I wrote the program, I would never have done something like that!

But this points to some of my weaknesses. For one thing, I have obviously not experienced working with bad programmers enough, or have been responsible for other people's bad programming enough. Certainly, the senior leadership in the engineering organization, who's been in engineering leadership roles for extended period of time, clearly is able to detect the bugs much quicker.

Sigh... so much for trying for management/lead positions...